Dear Dreams.
.
I do hope you come true. I have so many of you that its difficult to see a reality of you all existing.
My dreams:
To be skinny
To become successful
To feel loved and happy
.
Dear dream number 1.
I'm going to make you happen, no matter what. With out you I wouldn't be able to become successful in acting. I need to be thin to become a success. You mean everything to me. I've never been skinny, as you know, and I want to feel it. I want to finally feel how good it is to be skinny in MY EYES. So please come true before my Prom, I dont want to be fat for Prom.
KTHNXBY.
.
Dear dream number 2.
I honestly haven't the slightest clue how I'm going to make you happen. Not after college anyway. All I can see is going through college, then after that... nothing. I have unrealistic day dreams of being successful and I know they wont happen just like that *clicks fingers*. It will take work, and I am prepared to do that work. I'm working on everything NOW. Writing, acting, college, GCSEs, Singing, performing, drawing... anything that can improve me, improve my CV. Add to my list of accomplishments and goals.
I hope to see you in the near future.
Kodixxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
.
Dear dream number 3.
I day dream nearly every evening about finally being happy. Having fantastic friends, a gorgeous and darling finance/husband, two kids (ideally named Skandar and Ekho) who are insanely talented. Having a huge house, fantastic job... but I know thats not all I would need to feel loved and happy. These would be the most important people in my future life, who would bring me happiness and love. But I need to feel accomplished to be proud of myself, then I'd be happy. I need my ideal match in the future and I dont know if Skei is that person. I never imagined being with someone like him... so I dont know if it will be him or not. But Dear dream number 3, please come true. Its the foundation of a healthy person, which I currently am not.
Love Kodi x
Wednesday, 5 January 2011
Tuesday, 4 January 2011
4: A Relative
Dear Grannie.
.
You're my favourite family member. You're always so lovely and understand me better than my Mother does half the time. You also work hard a lot of the time, cleaning and being ill. I cant believe you chose my Granddad to b your husband. He's such a twat. Yeah, yeah he care about us and would do anything for us. He's a bastard who does nothing but complain! He expects hots drinks and dinner to be made for him when he wants it Even though he hasn't asked and is perfectly capable at doing it himself. I hate how he expects us (You, me and mum) to be doing all the cleaning and whatnot. Times have changed, women dont belong in the kitchen anymore.
.
It pisses me off so much that hes so fucking racist and homophobic! My best friend is BLACK and me and Skei are BISEXUAL! No wonder I haven't told anyone in the family Im bi.
.
Anyway.
You're always so lovely even though everyone has a go at you. Even though you've been ill recently, and been in hospital, I hope you get better because I'd hate it if you died. I dont think I could bare it. It was bad enough when Great Granddad died a couple of years ago and when Sparkie died earlier this year, I dont think I could stand loosing you too. You're way too young to die. (59)
You will be the only reason I come back 'home', just to see you. Coz you cant drive but Mum can so I could see her whenever.
I love you very much Grannie, I know I dont say it often enough. I know I'm a bitch most of the time too, but you're normally the only person I can stand in this house. And I'm not a morning person, so thats why I'm such a cow in the mornings.
.
I hope you get better Gran.
.
Losts of love from your only Grand Daugther
Kodi
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
.
You're my favourite family member. You're always so lovely and understand me better than my Mother does half the time. You also work hard a lot of the time, cleaning and being ill. I cant believe you chose my Granddad to b your husband. He's such a twat. Yeah, yeah he care about us and would do anything for us. He's a bastard who does nothing but complain! He expects hots drinks and dinner to be made for him when he wants it Even though he hasn't asked and is perfectly capable at doing it himself. I hate how he expects us (You, me and mum) to be doing all the cleaning and whatnot. Times have changed, women dont belong in the kitchen anymore.
.
It pisses me off so much that hes so fucking racist and homophobic! My best friend is BLACK and me and Skei are BISEXUAL! No wonder I haven't told anyone in the family Im bi.
.
Anyway.
You're always so lovely even though everyone has a go at you. Even though you've been ill recently, and been in hospital, I hope you get better because I'd hate it if you died. I dont think I could bare it. It was bad enough when Great Granddad died a couple of years ago and when Sparkie died earlier this year, I dont think I could stand loosing you too. You're way too young to die. (59)
You will be the only reason I come back 'home', just to see you. Coz you cant drive but Mum can so I could see her whenever.
I love you very much Grannie, I know I dont say it often enough. I know I'm a bitch most of the time too, but you're normally the only person I can stand in this house. And I'm not a morning person, so thats why I'm such a cow in the mornings.
.
I hope you get better Gran.
.
Losts of love from your only Grand Daugther
Kodi
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
3: My Parents
Dear Mum and Dad.
.
Its taken me so fucking long to understand you both and, honestly, I still dont know where you're coming from half the time. You seem to have faith in me when you're in a good mood but then when you snap you shout about how fucking useless I am.
Mum, I hate our family. I hate spending time with everyone because we cant have a nice conversation, or nice dinner, or even a nice Christmas. No one fucking cares or says thank you when I decide to do something nice like laying the Christmas table, filling and emptying the dish washer, sweeping the floors, cleaning the kitchen. I hardly ever get a thank you. Thats why I do fuck all most of the time because I dont think I should bother if I dont get any recognition for it. I'm not asking for money, honestly I clean downstairs because I cant stand the mess. All I really want is for someone to just say thank you and tell me I've done a good job.
Dad. You're knob most of the time. You forget the dates I'm meant to see you and blame it on me, you pretend everything is fine and dandy. You're a pain in the arse. Its irritating how You always bring your girlfriend when you see me. I like her and everything but she's not my mum, she's not related to me and you're not married. We have a shitty relationship with each other you haven't registered and sometimes I dont want to see Nan or speak to Tina. Sometimes I'd like to just sit down to dinner or something and talk to you. You cant remember anything to do with me these days, like what colleges I've applied too or the courses I want to take... Its not that difficult. I'm you're only child after all.
.
Generally, I am glad that you both split up when I was 3. I dont remember it. But I just dont know what its like to have a complete family where your parents are together. I'm jealous of people who got to experience that but I'm glad that I didn't have to go through that trauma as well. I'm also glad that you've both found someone you both really like.
(Although, Mum, your boyfriend is weird and act inappropriately to me and Gran. Please tell him to fuck off.)
I'm happy to see you both happy. However. Mum stop fucking canoodling in front of everyone. Me and Grannie bitch and complain about it. I would never snog Skei in front of all of you, sure I'd kiss him, hold hands or snuggle on the couch but nothing inappropriate.
Grow up Mum.
.
Love you're irritated daughter Kodi.
x
.
Its taken me so fucking long to understand you both and, honestly, I still dont know where you're coming from half the time. You seem to have faith in me when you're in a good mood but then when you snap you shout about how fucking useless I am.
Mum, I hate our family. I hate spending time with everyone because we cant have a nice conversation, or nice dinner, or even a nice Christmas. No one fucking cares or says thank you when I decide to do something nice like laying the Christmas table, filling and emptying the dish washer, sweeping the floors, cleaning the kitchen. I hardly ever get a thank you. Thats why I do fuck all most of the time because I dont think I should bother if I dont get any recognition for it. I'm not asking for money, honestly I clean downstairs because I cant stand the mess. All I really want is for someone to just say thank you and tell me I've done a good job.
Dad. You're knob most of the time. You forget the dates I'm meant to see you and blame it on me, you pretend everything is fine and dandy. You're a pain in the arse. Its irritating how You always bring your girlfriend when you see me. I like her and everything but she's not my mum, she's not related to me and you're not married. We have a shitty relationship with each other you haven't registered and sometimes I dont want to see Nan or speak to Tina. Sometimes I'd like to just sit down to dinner or something and talk to you. You cant remember anything to do with me these days, like what colleges I've applied too or the courses I want to take... Its not that difficult. I'm you're only child after all.
.
Generally, I am glad that you both split up when I was 3. I dont remember it. But I just dont know what its like to have a complete family where your parents are together. I'm jealous of people who got to experience that but I'm glad that I didn't have to go through that trauma as well. I'm also glad that you've both found someone you both really like.
(Although, Mum, your boyfriend is weird and act inappropriately to me and Gran. Please tell him to fuck off.)
I'm happy to see you both happy. However. Mum stop fucking canoodling in front of everyone. Me and Grannie bitch and complain about it. I would never snog Skei in front of all of you, sure I'd kiss him, hold hands or snuggle on the couch but nothing inappropriate.
Grow up Mum.
.
Love you're irritated daughter Kodi.
x
Sunday, 2 January 2011
2: To Someone I think is Cute
Dear Louis,
I can tell you're gonna be one fit mother fucker! I mean seriously, you're gonna be a heart breaker. You're one of the coolest little year 7 dudes I've ever met, seriously. You're nicer than Patty, haha. He's way too cocky for a year 7, you're actually funny but not in a snotty show off ish way. You have better hair too! Haha! Awesome flickedge you've got going on with it! FLICK-TWITCH! You were one of the only brothers I actually fucking heard! Its helps you have a deep voice and were the only one there with a deep voice, but you belted it out too! I was really impressed that a year 7 could do so well on stage. I knew a year seven who had an act for this kinda stuff, I was year 8 at the time and haven't seen him in years. But I have a feeling he's still carrying it on. So I hope you carry on too, I can see you being an awesome actor.
Anywayy Good luck and all that!
x
I can tell you're gonna be one fit mother fucker! I mean seriously, you're gonna be a heart breaker. You're one of the coolest little year 7 dudes I've ever met, seriously. You're nicer than Patty, haha. He's way too cocky for a year 7, you're actually funny but not in a snotty show off ish way. You have better hair too! Haha! Awesome flickedge you've got going on with it! FLICK-TWITCH! You were one of the only brothers I actually fucking heard! Its helps you have a deep voice and were the only one there with a deep voice, but you belted it out too! I was really impressed that a year 7 could do so well on stage. I knew a year seven who had an act for this kinda stuff, I was year 8 at the time and haven't seen him in years. But I have a feeling he's still carrying it on. So I hope you carry on too, I can see you being an awesome actor.
Anywayy Good luck and all that!
x
1: To My Best Friend
Dear Manny,
.
You're fucking awesome. The End. LOL JOKE I'M GONNA WRITE YOU A WHOLE FUCKING MISSION OF A LETTER!
Basically I love you, loads. You're the most awesome person I know and I dont know what I would have turned out to be like if I'd never met you. Probably fucking boring.
You're the only person who can make me laugh as to the point of silence and snorting. Except myself. I do make myself lol sometimes. But thats just sad. So dont go talking about that!! But back on track.
You're a talented fool who soooo deserves to be paid for being funny. Or be in TV or something like that!
We've had so many good times!
Halloween. HATCHET!! I cant believe I chose the fucking porn star *face palm*, we all died except Andrew! Well, he died at the end.
Bowling for Soup! Yes mother fucker! That was amazing, even though I was violated by those fat old guys! Blerghh!!
Naruto is funny stuff, I have officially decided you are Jiraya! End of! I'm still deciding who I am... Sasuke or Shikamaru? Hmm... But anyway You're the PERVY SAGEE! WOO!
Um to be honest this is kinda pointless... but I thought it'd be a good way to tell you how much I looooove you in a sisterly way!
.
I'm pretty sure you'll get some kind of sexy model wife (who's lovely) and have uber awesome kinds... one called Mikey *winkwink*. Whoever you fall in love with, Manny, is gonna be one lucky bitch! Coz you're one of the coolest, nicest and most interesting people I've ever met and I do indeed hope you'll always be in my life!
(fingers crossed we'll be in some of the same classes together next year!)
I love you!
Lots of Love!
Your 'little sister'
<3
.
You're fucking awesome. The End. LOL JOKE I'M GONNA WRITE YOU A WHOLE FUCKING MISSION OF A LETTER!
Basically I love you, loads. You're the most awesome person I know and I dont know what I would have turned out to be like if I'd never met you. Probably fucking boring.
You're the only person who can make me laugh as to the point of silence and snorting. Except myself. I do make myself lol sometimes. But thats just sad. So dont go talking about that!! But back on track.
You're a talented fool who soooo deserves to be paid for being funny. Or be in TV or something like that!
We've had so many good times!
Halloween. HATCHET!! I cant believe I chose the fucking porn star *face palm*, we all died except Andrew! Well, he died at the end.
Bowling for Soup! Yes mother fucker! That was amazing, even though I was violated by those fat old guys! Blerghh!!
Naruto is funny stuff, I have officially decided you are Jiraya! End of! I'm still deciding who I am... Sasuke or Shikamaru? Hmm... But anyway You're the PERVY SAGEE! WOO!
Um to be honest this is kinda pointless... but I thought it'd be a good way to tell you how much I looooove you in a sisterly way!
.
I'm pretty sure you'll get some kind of sexy model wife (who's lovely) and have uber awesome kinds... one called Mikey *winkwink*. Whoever you fall in love with, Manny, is gonna be one lucky bitch! Coz you're one of the coolest, nicest and most interesting people I've ever met and I do indeed hope you'll always be in my life!
(fingers crossed we'll be in some of the same classes together next year!)
I love you!
Lots of Love!
Your 'little sister'
<3
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